Mzansi, we need to chat… “Why Do I Keep Dreaming About My Ex” recently exploded on Google Search but it was all Gauteng. We’ve got ten reasons why you may be having these dreams; please read them here so you can stop making our collective search look so bad.
Johannesburg, South Africa (14 February 2023) – Ahead of Valentine’s Day, ThePleasantDream analysed Google Search Data to see the prominent search queries doing the rounds and Gauteng seem to have been very busy dreaming about their exes.
The team found “Why Do I Keep Dreaming About My Ex” has witnessed a hike of 65% in January 2023 in South Africa and Gauteng topped the list of people asking this question!
What do the statistics highlight?
The search query “why do I keep dreaming about my ex” had an 830 search volume in October 2022; in November, it was 930; in December, it was 770; and now, in January 2023, it is 1270.
Besides, the audience for this query was from Gauteng (49.8%), Western Cape (15.4%), KwaZulu-Natal (11.3%), Eastern Cape (5.3%), Mpumalanga (5%), and a culmination of other provinces (13.1%). The team fetched all this data using Google Keyword Planner.
From this, it is clear that people are looking for reasons behind such a dream. So, we asked our expert Dr Nereida Gonzalez-Berrios, MD, reviewer and certified psychiatrist, to shed light on why people see dreams of their ex.
So, let’s explore expert insights. Here are some reasons behind the dreams about your ex!

Some incomplete business between the two of you
There are times when relationships end on a sour note. So, you might be unhappy about how things ended between you and your ex. In addition, you might be looking for some warmth or emotional closeness with someone, maybe your present partner. All this trauma or the repressed wish to make things work could sum up the reason for seeing them in your dream.
Dissatisfaction with the current relationship
You might look happy from the outside in your current relationship; however, there might be some problems lurking. For example, your needs might be unmet, or your partner cannot give you their time, love, and emotional support. So, dreaming about that old flame is just a symbolic manifestation of your wish fulfilment.
The grief has not gone yet
Nobody likes to end a relationship, but there are times when you have to let go and move on. However, dreams about your ex reflect that the whole breakup process was heartbreaking for you & you are unable to let go of those memories. So, you are still mourning and cannot overcome the pain. But, it could also mean you miss that person and secretly wish for their return.
Getting into the process of emotional healing
The reference to dreams about your ex means you have forgiven them for their mistakes. You also want to make peace with them and with yourself too. You are letting go of the pain and insecurities you faced in the relationship.
Besides, you are directing your feelings toward healing the bruised and wounded parts of yourself. Then, finally, you are ready to leave the emotional baggage and move on with life.
Lack of partner in waking life
If you are single after a breakup, then there are chances of seeing your ex in dreams. The reason behind this is your loneliness in waking life. The dream doesn’t highlight that you are missing them and wishing to get back. Instead, it means you want to be someone who will love and care for you diligently.
Besides, you may also feel sad and anxious because of a lack of a partner in your waking life. This inadequacy from within is why your ex appears in the dream to become an emotional image for intimacy, trust, and friendship.
Working out things with your ex-partner
If you are working out things between the two of you, you may get dreams about your ex. Your subconscious mind is giving you a wake-up call to look into the pros and cons of everything in your waking life. It asks you to evaluate whether this decision is rational and worthy or if you are relying on emotions.
Repressed emotions
Your ex may appear in your dream because of repressed feelings within you. It could be that your partner initiated the breakup, but you never wanted it. You gave 100% for this relationship, but it still failed. Your unconscious mind’s unmet needs and desires appear in dreams.
Feeling of guilt
If you feel guilty about doing something wrong to your ex, then it could be why they appeared in your dream. Maybe you have hurt or been unkind toward their feelings, and you are sad about it. Besides, if you constantly have such feelings, the dream tells you to let go of negative emotions, forgive yourself, and move on with your life.
Codependency in relationship
If you were ever in a codependent relationship with your ex, they might frequently show in your dreams. And the reason behind this is that you cannot live without them. You constantly miss them because, back of your mind, you think that nobody can give you that comfort or emotional closeness other than them. So, you will always compare your present partner with your ex and appear in dreams too.
A timeline of wish-fulfilment
When you see your ex in the dream, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you want that person back in life. But it is like a wish fulfilment vision that helps reconnect with your ex-lover. A reason to revisit a happy timeline and some sweet, fond memories you never wished to part away with.
You also want to have the same degree of happiness in your current relationship. Thus, the dream shows your unconscious wishes and desires that need to be manifested in waking life.
400 more searches than normal… surely due to a popular radio song? Anyone falling for Snap by Rosa Linn like I am? ;D