Sometimes the holiday season is more stressful than cheerful for the youngest members of the family. Child Mental Health advocate, Norleen Zulu, invites parents to pause and consider ways to be more emotionally present for their children amid the gatherings, shopping and festivities.
Johannesburg, South Africa (18 December 2025) – We often view the holiday season as a time of celebration, joy and family connection. However, for many children, the holidays bring with them overwhelming emotions.
Parents often focus on perfection and ticking the “perfect holiday” checklist, wrapping gifts, planning meals and meeting social expectations. Whilst children silently navigate a world of overstimulation, disrupted routines, intrusive family members and unspoken feelings, they don’t yet have the language to express or the courage to confront.
As a Child Mental Health and Wellness Advocate, Norleen Zulu has witnessed time and again how the season can intensify emotional challenges in children that remain invisible to adults.
“Amidst the festive excitement, some children quietly grapple with anxiety, loneliness, sensory overload and sometimes fear. The notion that “all children love the holidays” can easily cause parents to overlook those who are struggling,” Norleen says.
After all your hard work saving and preparing for the holidays, wouldn’t you be gutted to realise that some of your efforts may have accidentally enhanced your child’s anxiety?
Norleen invites every parent and caregiver to consider whether certain holiday activities are truly for the family, or a deep-rooted form of personal gratification disguised as festive tradition.
“Most importantly, would you ever consider a quiet and calm holiday season if you knew it would protect and maintain your children’s mental well-being?
“These questions aren’t criticisms; they are open invitations for deeper awareness and introspection.”
What Do Children Struggle with During the Holidays?
Children may feel pressure to “be happy” just because the season requires it. This expectation can be both confusing and overwhelming for a child who is tired, overstimulated, or anxious.
“When children sense adult stress or emotional disconnect, they absorb it, turning an assumed joyous time into moments of pressure. They mostly find emotional safety in routines. The holiday season is often spontaneous and irregular and this disruption of routine can trigger anxiety for them. Sleep, meals and daily rhythms shift, leaving some feeling disoriented and unsettled.”
Norleen also touches on the reality of overstimulation, noting that loud gatherings, constant visits from family and friends, new and crowded environments and even crowded malls can be overwhelming.
“Children may start to feel sensory overload which will often present itself through irritability, clinginess, or an emotional shutdown. Unfortunately, because of the hustle, bustle and festive cheer, parents may not even notice the shift in their children’s countenance or loneliness.”
This may leave them feeling isolated, craving their parents’ attention, affectionate hugs and acknowledgement. Their loneliness often hides behind obedience or silence.
How Do We Render Support?
- By creating calm emotional spaces. Remember to prioritise your children’s emotional well-being. Check in with them and ask questions like: How are you feeling today? What was the hardest part of your day
- Maintaining soft routines like keeping sleep, meals and quiet moments as consistent as possible.
- Teaching coping tools. Have open conversations about asking for help and speaking out when feeling overwhelmed. Teach them deep breathing and grounding techniques. Introduce simple, easy affirmations and journaling to support their emotional regulation
- Prioritise presence over perfection. Show your children that you see them, you hear them, and you value them. A calm 10-15 minutes of connection often nourishes a child more than an entire day of activities.
- Look out for emotional red flags! Keep an eye out for withdrawal, silence, persistent sadness, sudden aggression, back chat or comments that indicate hopelessness or anger.
Holidays are an Opportunity to Connect, Not a Performance!
Sometimes, slowing down and becoming more emotionally present helps transform the festive season into an opportunity to strengthen our children from the inside out. Calmer holidays do not mean less joy; in fact, they can translate to joy that is more grounded, meaningful and emotionally safe.
“Our children may not always verbalise their emotions, but their behaviour speaks clearly.
“So, I encourage all of us this holiday season, to choose gentleness, connection and awareness over pressure and performance because our children’s mental wellbeing is worth far more than any content and tradition,” Norleen concludes.
Sources: Norleen Zulu
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