KY-ND, the brand, was born from heartbreak and loss but has become a symbol of support in South Africa and a way to give back to children.
South Africa (10 March 2024) – Jenni Rowe has found peace after losing her son to suicide, through honouring his life and sharing kindness. By founding the brand KY-ND, she has found a way to give back to children in need while creating an important conversation in South Africa.
Jenni’s son Ky left this world on the 9th of August 2022; she was left shattered by the loss, saying it felt like being hit by a tsunami. She questioned every moment of his life leading up to that moment.
“Ky was so strong and present, he was the helper, the listener, the carer, sometimes the joker and player, with the most gorgeous, cheeky smile who touched so many lives…Ky had decided that he couldn’t live with the pain he was feeling in that moment, in those few hours…”
“You analyse every discussion, every tough moment, every harsh word uttered by peers and teachers, every knock in his Life, every moment that you offered guidance and love and why that wasn’t enough. You have to look inward, you have to process, you have to question, you have to sit in the excruciating pain…
BUT how do you survive? I’m still learning! I have to practise KY-ND to self, a really tough one, but so vital! I can’t change what happened. This is not a journey I envisaged, ever! It is not a journey I wish anyone else to have to go on…In this, I have lost who I was before…But what I still am is a Mom to my younger son.”
In the lead-up to the one-year anniversary of Ky’s death, Jenni chose to honour his life and do something that would bring change, create a moment for conversation and help children in need. She had a bench installed at his high school, where she often sat and welcomed students who needed to talk. A bench was also installed at Stellenbosch University, where Ky had been studying.
Inspired by a letter from a friend who described Ky as a Ky-nd young man, Jenni set out to spread Ky-nd-ness to as many people as she could. With the help of friends, the KY-ND brand was born.
High-quality t-shirts featuring Ky’s tree tattoo along with words of kindness were created with the purpose of raising funds for Operation Smile South Africa.
“Since Ky died I have had a deep sense of wanting to honour his Life and Legacy by trying to reach out and help others who may be feeling alone and unworthy as he did in his Life.
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I wanted to start conversations around owning our words and actions and the impact they have and what it really means to be kind. How do we start talking about owning our feelings, own our pain? How do we start connecting and reaching out? We need to talk about the tough issues we face…
It’s really Ok to not be Ok! Words matter!”
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“What we teach our children in some schools is outdated. There is a huge opportunity to reach Children in their younger years and really teach them Life skills they can use in their everyday lives.
I want to start conversations with children in primary school. We need to speak about the things that bother them, upset them…we need to start instilling the belief in them that they matter. That what they feel means something…that someone cares. They need to be KY-ND to themselves first…if they feel different, it is ok.
Not everyone fits the stereotype of who we should be and according to who…They are Ok…they matter and it is Ok to not be Ok too… I believe there should be facilitated discussion groups with peers where they feel safe to speak and then realise their thoughts and emotions are shared. We need to listen, we need to show compassion we need to heal, we need to be KY-ND…”
Jenni hopes that the brand will go beyond being a fashion statement. Her goal is to find purpose in every day and to touch lives by showing up, reaching out, listening and sharing authentically whether a smile or a compliment to a stranger. And most of all, by having Gratitude despite the pain!
You can find out more about KY-ND here. And if you see someone wearing the shirt, say hello.
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