After losing her 21-year-old son Wesley, Karen shares her story with a message to parents: show kindness, make time, and love your kids while you can.
Grassy Park, Cape Town (14 August 2025) – Five years have passed since the day Karen Davids lost her son Wesley. Five years of learning how to carry a weight the family never asked for, and never wanted.
Tuesday was the anniversary of the day they lost Wesley, suddenly, without warning, and without answers, at just 21 years old. While the Davids honour him in every way, the ache still remains, and likely always will.
“Grief is like a second skin,” says Karen. “Yes, you carry it with you, always. I enjoy little things, I smile and laugh and crack jokes, but in an instant, it can all change.”
She has learned that it doesn’t go away; it reshapes you. And in that reshaping, she is sharing her call to kindness. Karen is telling Wesley’s story, both to keep his memory alive and to urge parents to slow down, be present, and love their kids without any hesitation.
Wesley was more than a son to Karen and Clint. He was a big brother to his little sister Jamie, a fiercely loyal friend, and, from a young age, a boy with a deep love for music.
His mom still treasures his pre-school report card from June 2003, where four-year-old Wes declared his future ambition was ‘to become the best DJ ever.’
By 13, he was behind the decks at his first gig at the then Club Montreal, with his mom cheering from the crowd. Karen remembers being at every gig, laughing about how his dad was the muscle often needed to lug turntables around.
In his later years, Wesley went on to produce music, collaborate with other artists, and create a close circle he considered family.
“Maybe we didn’t do too badly, if what we managed to give the world was a kindhearted soul, a jokester at times, and someone you would be happy to call a friend. He gave the best hugs ever, too,” says Karen.
Then, his death was sudden. No medical cause could be found. The autopsy was inconclusive. For the family who lost their son and brother, not knowing has been its own form of grief.
“It’s another chapter on acceptance in itself,” says Karen, one she’s navigated with faith and the support of her ‘village’ – the friends, family, and community who’ve stood by her side through the toughest battle imaginable.
Now, every year, she marks the day of her son’s death with a ritual. A long walk along the coast brings her closer to her Wes. It’s a time for reflection and gratitude, even in the heartbreak.
This week, on 12 August, she did just that.
“I’m doing my ritual of walking along the coast on the day of his death, just being in nature makes me feel closer to him, and is good for my soul.”
She posted about it on The Village’s Facebook page, where many other grieving souls shared her pain, a mother who had lost her young daughter 7 years ago. Another who had lost her son, just as he had written the last exam towards an Honours degree. A wife who had lost her husband three years ago, after 31 years of marriage.
Yes, this story is about grief, about sadness. It is also about kindness. About being good to the ones you hold close and loving them fiercely with every passing day.
Parents and kids will have their ups and downs. It’s part of the journey. Just as the seasons change, there will be moments of disagreement, flashes of stubbornness, and times where you’re both simply learning how to navigate life together, side by side, while your child figures out their place in the world.
This is where Karen’s message matters most.
If you are running school lifts, picking up after your kids, cooking for them, or simply sitting in the same room, just be thankful. If you’re unhappy, make a change. Life is too short for ‘maybe one day.’
“Sometimes we get too caught up in the ‘stuff’. You know, the things that keep us all so very busy. We don’t have time or make time for what really counts in the end,” says Karen. “What have I learned while being here? Surely, that love should always be at the core of it all.”
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