17 years, 17 surgeries, and countless battles later, Hayley Bailey stands not as a victim of her circumstances but as a warrior, defying every odd life has thrown at her with courage, hope, and an unbreakable spirit.
Johannesburg, South Africa (23 December 2024) – In between the festive joy of the Monte Casino Christmas Market, I had the privilege of meeting Hayley Bailey at the Good Things Guy bookstand. While the air buzzed with laughter, carols, and holiday cheer, Hayley shared a story that stopped me in my tracks.
Hers is not just a story of suffering but a powerful reminder of the strength of the human spirit and the boundless capacity for hope, even in the face of overwhelming odds.
A Journey Through the Unimaginable
Hayley’s medical journey began 17 years ago in 2007, following what was supposed to be a routine surgery to remove cysts. During the procedure, her colon was accidentally slit – a mistake that unleashed a cascade of unimaginable complications. When her pleas for help went unheard for days, she slipped into a coma just as her condition reached a critical point. Surgeons worked through the night to remove a significant portion of her colon and stomach, battling severe sepsis, collapsed lungs, and other life-threatening conditions.
For months, Hayley remained in the hospital, enduring an agonising recovery. The wound from her surgery refused to heal, forcing doctors to use suction tubes and other painful interventions. By October of that year, her condition worsened – her body herniated, requiring yet another operation. Once again, more of her colon and stomach had to be removed.
But the ordeal didn’t end there.
Between 2008 and 2018, Hayley underwent 12 more abdominal surgeries. Her body repeatedly rejected the medical mesh used to stabilise her insides, creating a cruel cycle of herniation, reoperation, and further loss of vital organs.
In 2018, a breakthrough came with the diagnosis of Nutcracker Syndrome, also known as Superior Mesenteric Artery Syndrome. Her condition meant that her renal vein, superior mesenteric artery, and aorta were essentially strangled. The subsequent surgery was massive – her duodenum was cut, and more diseased colon and stomach were removed.
Despite initial success, complications arose again, leading to further operations within a week.
For a while, Hayley seemed to regain her strength. She even began to put on weight, something she hadn’t managed in years. But then COVID-19 hit, and her body began to betray her again. By 2020, eating became impossible. Swallowing was painful and food simply would not stay down. The resulting weakness left her bedridden and struggling with even the simplest of tasks.
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“I was so weak I couldn’t walk more than five metres without collapsing,” Hayley recalls. “Even simple tasks like showering became impossible. It was soul-destroying.”
By 2021, Hayley was fitted with an NJ (nasojejunal) tube to bypass her stomach and allow for nutrition. For 11 months, she relied on this tube, enduring frequent and traumatic replacements. Eventually, a more permanent PEJ (percutaneous endoscopic jejunostomy) tube was inserted directly into her jejunum.
But the complications didn’t stop.
Hayley developed severe pain, necessitating ketamine infusions, nerve blocks, and morphine treatments, though her body’s resistance to medications made effective pain management almost impossible. Despite all of this, Hayley pushed forward, supported by her husband Simon and her two sons.
“I’ve had to learn so many life lessons I wish I’d never had to,” she admits. “It’s broken me, but it’s also made me stronger. I’m a fighter, not a quitter.”
In 2023, Hayley faced yet another series of life-altering challenges. In January, she broke her leg while helping her blind and deaf dog, a fracture so severe it required 19 screws and two plates. In March, she suffered a massive heart attack, which she survived only because she refused to stop moving, even as her body failed her.
“I kept myself busy, moving around,” she shares. “I think that’s what saved my life. I just couldn’t give up.”
By May, her abdominal issues flared again, resulting in severe infections, stoma complications, and more surgeries. In one of her hospital stays Hayley endured a particularly gruelling five weeks battling septic shock and third-degree burns caused by leaking stomach acid.
“Pain can be so surreal and disorienting,” Hayley explains. “Sometimes, I feel like an observer of my own life, not a participant.”
In July this year, Hayley was readmitted to have a feeding tube inserted and remove her nasal tube, only to face a dangerous infection, septic shock, and two months in hospital instead of the planned two nights. At just 30kg and battling an array of medical conditions—including gastric paresis, intestinal failure, and CIPO—she has endured 17 major surgeries, countless procedures, and daily pain that feels like labour 24/7. In September, her pain worsened as her feeding tube failed again. Despite feeling defeated, she pulled through yet another procedure to have a new tube inserted.
Hayley’s journey is a constant fight against her body. Her medical struggles, including a frozen bowel and failing veins, mean regular hospital stays, procedures, and unimaginable pain.
Finding Strength in the Chaos
But through all this, Hayley has refused to give up. Her strength comes from her family, her husband Simon, and her unshakable love for her two sons.
Hayley says that she lives for her parents and doesn’t know what she would do without them,
“My mother has been my utter rock too, my support beyond description, looking after me for all these years. She always surprises me with many things to make my life easier. She has helped me out financially to a massive degree, to the point that I have now put her in a terrible financial predicament, which really kills me and I hope to repay her now that I’m working. She really is my hero!”
“My dad and Stepmom have also been my heroes and have worn their knees out, praying for me and supporting me with so much love it’s inexplicable! I don’t know what I’d do without any of my parents. I live for them!”
Simon, whom she calls her lifeline, has been her unwavering support, offering care, comfort, and encouragement every step of the way.
“My Simon is my rock,” she says with a smile. “His kindness, strength, and unwavering love get me through every single day. I must be the luckiest girl alive.”
Hayley’s sons are her world, and despite everything, she beams with pride when she talks about them.
“They make my world spin and can turn any dark day into sunshine,” she says.
Her eldest son, Keagan, has been working tirelessly to build a better future, and her younger son, Matt, is her rock, helping her navigate daily life with kindness and care.
Despite her health challenges, Hayley recently began a job working with the elderly – a role she describes as her calling. She speaks passionately about the connections she’s formed and the joy she finds in helping others.
“I love what I do. It gives me purpose, even on the hardest days,” she says.
Hayley’s journey is a profound lesson in gratitude and perseverance. While her medical conditions have robbed her of a “normal” life, they’ve also taught her to appreciate the smallest victories and cherish the love of those around her. She admits that the fight is exhausting, but she continues to rise each day, determined to make the most of the time she has.
“I may be gravely sick, but I’m just so grateful,” Hayley says. “Grateful for my family, for my boys, for Simon, and for every day I get to live. There has to be a reason I’m still here, and I’m holding out for it.”
For those of us who are fortunate enough to wake up healthy, Hayley’s story is a powerful reminder to hold our loved ones a little tighter, to be grateful for every moment, and to find strength even in the darkest times.
“Wake up every day and find something—anything—to be grateful for,” Hayley says. “We never know when our flame will go out. Hold your loved ones tight and live each day as if it were your last.”
As I walked away from the Christmas Market that evening, I couldn’t stop thinking about Hayley. Her courage, her love for her family, and her determination to keep going left a lasting impression. She may face battles that many of us can’t comprehend, but she does so with grace, strength, and an unrelenting will to live.
How You Can Help
Hayley’s medical journey has come at an immense financial cost. To keep her life-sustaining care going, she’s started a BackaBuddy campaign. Every contribution, no matter the size, helps Hayley continue her fight and provides her family with some relief in an otherwise overwhelming situation.
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